A reader named Deb was kind enough to share her thoughts about "ice breakers". We'd love to hear from you too!

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Ice Breakers

The first step in any relationship is conversation. For some of us, socializing comes easily and for others, it’s a source of stress and anxiety. Some people rely on cheesy pickup lines to get things started and some prefer a more sincere approach.

One of the easiest ways to start a conversation is to comment on an object in your immediate surroundings. For me, that’s my motorcycle. No matter where I go, the huge red and black bike decked out in chrome attracts attention. What makes it even more interesting is that a woman is riding that very large and impressive bike.

Just yesterday, I had ridden out to one of my favorite watering holes to enjoy a quiet drink. I spent most of my time in a comfortable chair on the deck outside, enjoying the music and the unseasonably cool breeze of an early fall in the desert. There was a good-sized crowd, but no one really talked to me, except for one guy who asked if I worked there. I found myself wishing I had said "yes" just to have a conversation. After an hour or so, I got ready to hit the road again.

One man in the parking lot was checking out my bike, and we started talking. He pointed out his own ride, a bright yellow Lotus sports car with black racing stripes. He also owned a motorcycle and we joked about how the engine in my bike was as big as the one in his car.

You can use any excuse to open a conversation. Sometimes, all it takes is a look or a smile. After that, keep the conversation moving. If there is a TV in the bar, pick up on the latest current event and make a comment. Be sure to stay away from politics or religion. Avoid being negative, too. don't complain about your job, friends (or lack thereof), clothing or hair. Definitely leave out the sexual innuendos and talk of the ex.

Stay positive and upbeat (without being obnoxious) and make the conversation a pleasant one. Hopefully, the person you are talking to will want to come back for more.

Written by Deb. Posted by Gregg.